Tuesday, January 29, 2013

I need not wait.


And as I sat there, convincing him to love me.  Writing yet another something, something that would push him over the edge I realized something.  That, YES, what I wrote him was good and it would put him there.  But he’s a moving target he’ll never be there for long. 

And while I sit here waiting for him like a chick out of a Jane Austen book I realize that he may or may not be back.  He probably will.  Is that enough? And while I seriously do not know the answer to that question I can answer myself this.  I need not wait. I really need to think that one through. I need not wait. 

I need to stop waiting for my life to happen.  Waiting for the one to come rescue me.  He can’t even rescue himself; he’s not coming back for me anytime soon.  And as I sit here I realize I need to be empowered.  Wow I just wrote I COULD be empowered. NO. I NEED to be empowered.  My own strength is going to get me through all of this.  This is going to be my year.  I really won’t have it any other way.  Hey I have a question…it doesn’t count as me being cliché if I say that after like January 5th right?

I need not wait.
I need not wait.
I need not wait.

I’m coming for you Los Angeles.  And supposedly I’m checking my shit load of baggage at the door.

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